“What do you want?” There’s a hint of anticipation as well as question in her eyes, but no wariness now.
It’s tempting to admit, her.
I could reveal the depth of my adoration with one word. And perhaps she’d give me her body for the day, or the night. I think that curiosity in her expression might get the better of her, and she’d allow me to steal away her innocence. I’d love to. My cock demands I take her with every throb of blood through it. Yes, I want to give her release, and it soothes my soul to do that. Joining us would be even sweeter. Stroking into her for my pleasure as well as hers, having her tighten around me and come on my cock.
But I won’t bargain for her love. I only want that freely given and forever.
Neither will I allow my baser urges to wreck me, or harm her. If I have her, she’ll be mine. But she deserves the choice of liberty. I won’t coerce her into being with me, however much I might want it. I am enough of a bastard to take her virginity; I’m not so immoral as to steal her for my own without her knowing.
I can’t help the bone-deep feeling that she’s mine, but I can let her decide, keep her out of harm’s way, for now at least.
“Don’t leave until either they’re dead, or I’ve found a new safe house for you,” I say.
“You want me to stay?”
Always. Forever. I want her by my side and in my bed. “Just until you’re safe.”
She’d be safer with me.
Those trusting blue eyes peek out from under her long lashes. When did she start to have such faith in me? She puts down her knife and fork, and traces a pattern on the worktop with her fingertip, thinking, white teeth pressing onto that plush pink bottom lip.
“But you won’t be able to keep me safe until I’ve decided about what happens to the leaders?”
I nod. “Have you made up your mind?”
Her mouth twists. “No. I don’t… I’m not sure what the right way is.”
“It’s a lot of responsibility.” I should know. I make these decisions day in, day out. A rival, a retaliation, an enemy. All their lives in my palm. Anything that keeps Jeanette happy and away from those who mean her harm is a no-brainer to me, so I hadn’t even thought about letting the Carters and Fletchers live. But she hasn’t had this weight on her shoulders before. Does she really even want it? “If you don’t want blood on your hands, I’ll send you to a new safe house without knowing what happened. You can leave at midnight, as we originally agreed.”
That makes her gaze snap to mine. “No! If you’ll allow me, I want to make the judgement. Can you hold off on the safe house and the… Permanent solution… Until I’ve made my mind up?”
“Yes.” It’s good she’s thinking about this seriously. And there’s another reason to be happy about her indecision. Every hour she isn’t sure if she wants escape or blood, she remains with me. “You have all the time you need.”
A secret smile lights her eyes, so subtle that anyone who didn’t study her as hard as I do wouldn’t notice it.
“What would you like to do today?” I ask.
“I get a choice?” she scoffs.
“I aim to please my prisoner.” She has no idea how much.
“More lessons on defence.” Her chin tilts up.
“Okay.” I like the idea of protecting her myself, of course. But if defending herself is what she needs, I’ll provide. “You know what your two best securities are?”
She narrows her eyes as she thinks. “A gun. And a knife.”
I laugh, I can’t help it. She’s a true innocent.
“What?” She scowls and it’s adorable. Like a grumpy kitten. I want to scoop her up and kiss the pucker from between her graceful brows.
“Instinct. That tingle in your spine and the back of your mind. The knowledge your body has that something is wrong. That’s your best shield from danger.” It’s all very well for me to feel that tingle and smile with anticipation of the ignorant arses I’ll scrub from the world. But I want her to be cautious. She is more precious than a dozen Fabergé eggs. She’s priceless and irreplaceable.
Her forehead wrinkles and I reach over to stroke the lines away. “I’ll take care of you as long as you’re here. And after that, your words, beautiful girl. Your wit and your insight. Keep him talking.”
“I’ve never been much good at that.” Fiddling with the hem of her top, she crosses and uncrosses her legs, drawing my gaze. They’re long and slim and a little coltish. Like she’s still learning how they work, and how the brush of her thighs together can affect a man. “Talking, I mean. I always say the wrong thing, and people misunderstand me.”
“Me too,” I confess without thinking. All my thoughts are with her lovely calves.
“The big mafia boss is misunderstood.” She tilts her head and skims her gaze over me. I suddenly fear maybe she can see everything, including how gone I am for her. “You’re terrifying and brutal. You killed a man without a second glance yesterday.”
I open my mouth to say the shot was to the shoulder, to incapacitate not kill, and I told my second-in-command to clean up. Linda knows to save a life if possible. But Jeanette continues. “You’re the playboy kingpin. You’re a ruthless businessman. A cliche in a smart suit with a glass of expensive alcohol and a penthouse suite of ten floors in the most prestigious address in London.”
I nod, but honestly, I’m a little disappointed. Yes, I am all of those things.
“But I suppose you are misunderstood. Because you’re also kind and do what you think is right, despite the consequences. You looked after me even though you didn’t need to and I told you not to, and started a war within your mafia alliance for a slip of a girl—”
“You’re not just a slip of a girl,” I mutter.
“You’re hardworking—don’t think I didn’t see your laptop open last night—and you look after your people. You’re never seen with the same woman on your arm twice, which means you don’t cruelly raise hopes. And I think…” She pauses and licks her lips. It’s a guileless gesture, probably indicating her nerves, but it sizzles down my back. “I think you’re lonely.”
My lungs collapse. So does my heart. Every one of my internal organs throws down tools and shrugs with a, she’s got you, boss. Not even a full day we’ve spent together as adults and it’s like she’s not just in my thoughts, she can pick through my thoughts.
How does she know all that?
“Apparently I’m not misunderstood by you.” This girl sees straight into my soul.
“Takes one to know one,” she mumbles, and looks away, suddenly shy.
No parents to love and encourage her, a traumatic past she must hide from everyone, and a starchy private school. I can see why she’s lonely too. She needs someone who knows her and cares for her without end. Someone who loves her to the outermost stars that look black from here on earth, and back again.
Like me.
And that care means not pushing her further right now. “Very perceptive. What about we try some more practical scenarios. Self-defence only,” I add.
Gratitude flares in her eyes when she looks up and agrees with a soft, “Okay.”
Back in the gym, there’s a tacit agreement that we’re to be serious. I spend hours ignoring my body’s reaction to hers when I grab her, again and again, from different angles and in various ways and congratulate her as I wince when she ultimately manages to land some hits. I teach her how to listen to my breathing and predict which direction I’m going to lunge. She’s whip-smart and picks up everything after one or two goes.
Eventually, she flops onto the springy rubber mat and groans. Her top rides up a little and I avert my gaze.
“I’m knackered.”
“That was nothing compared to being in my bed,” I say under my breath. Not low enough for her to miss, however. She perks up.
“Sit down with me.” Patting the space next to her, she gets this sexy, excited smile on her face.
“Jeanette,” I warn, but as I fold my long limbs onto the floor mats at a decent distance, my knees creaking.
“What about from this angle,” she chirps with false innocence. She knows exactly what she’s doing as she scoots across to me. “We haven’t practised on the ground. Or what if I was on a bed?”
“You’re not going to be on the floor with a man. And definitely not a bed.” That comes out rather more like a decree than I intend, but I’ve had to keep my arousal on a leash as tight and stretched as elastic, and I can’t promise I won’t break if she tests me.
“You said to exploit sensitive areas.” Her hand is tentative as she reaches down. I hold my breath, unable to think or feel or rationalise the myriad of reasons I should put a stop to this.
My desire for this girl has turned me inside out. She makes me into a monster who would snatch her away and covet her for himself.
“What if…” She shuffles closer on her knees. With her hair spilling out from the braid and over her shoulders she’s my daydreams come to life. Her small hands grip the waistband of my shorts and her mouth opens in a gasp as she drags them down, revealing my rock-solid erection.
For a second I’m convinced she’ll take one look at my big cock and run away. But although she blushes furiously, she doesn’t back down. My brave girl.
“It does look sensitive. This vein…” She traces a featherlight trail down my length.
I should stop her. I should pull up my shorts and return us to what we were doing. But I can’t do anything but stare.
“Would this be an effective way of fighting you off?” she says teasingly, but before I can choke a reply her lips cover my cock. Tentatively at first, unsure of how to proceed, but the feel of her warm wet mouth has me unable to move.
“Of incapacitating me,” I groan. “Temporarily.”
She kisses over the head of my cock, her lips shiny with my precum.
Another man whispers, “Take it into your mouth.” Not me. I wouldn’t encourage this when I know it’s only escalating my obsession with her.
She sucks me and my hips jerk involuntarily. I’m crazy with the feel of her wet lips.
“But it’s not a good ploy.” I growl the advice out against every instinct in me, all of which want her to continue.
“Mmm?” Her enquiring noise hums through the sensitive end of my cock and it’s all I can do not to come there and then.
“I suspect you’re going to be very, very good at this. If your aim is to escape, it’s a disaster. I might never let you go.” A warning and a promise, but she purrs with contentment. “And if you tried this on any other man but me I’d have to kill him.”
That makes her shake with silent laughter, but she doesn’t stop moving over my cock.
“Not a joke,” I grind out. Jeanette belongs to me. Nothing would keep me from protecting her. The only force in the universe that will prevent me from claiming her is her. She could leave me, accept the safe house I’ve offered and I’d be a shell of a man, half a person, empty and dead. But I’d still look after her and I’d still do my duty like a massive oak tree, hollow on the inside but sustaining life. One thing matters to me and I’d burn this city to the ground if that was what was needed to make her happy.
Her violet eyes are full of wonder when they meet mine. She fidgets her legs as she works her mouth on my cock, pressing them together and circling her hips. And I think… Damn but I think this turns her on.
But though part of me is desperate to flip this and satisfy the ache she must have between her legs, the little noises she’s making and the rhythm of her bobbing onto my cock are like a drug. I give in to her. I lean back and allow myself to watch her glossy lips take me.
I’ve imagined this as I jerked off into my hand too many times to admit, but the reality is even better. It’s just as filthy, but it’s heart-wrenchingly tender as well. Her hair tickles my inner thigh and she might not have done this before but that’s part of her appeal. She doesn’t know to completely cover her teeth and it’s the tiny sensations that make this more than my imagination could have conjured. The brush of her hair. The occasional jab of slight pain as she catches me only heightens the pleasure. And the way she’s enjoying it too, that’s what slays me. Her pebbled nipples showing through her top.
I store every detail away. I don’t close my eyes and just feel. I observe her intensely. For this moment, she’s my only thought. I’m her captor, her watcher, her guard. Nothing she does will go unnoticed by me.
It takes all my strength not to grab the back of her head, or tangle my fingers in her hair. Another time, I promise myself, even though I know that’s a promise I’ll break. I would love to unleash a bit of violence and fuck her mouth, but she’s sweet in her exploration. I let her suck me. That was the point, after all, of my teaching her self-defence—so she could feel strong. Looking down at her, I can see that in spadefuls. She knows I’m losing my mind, and is enjoying every second of my capitulation.
And much as I want to draw this out, as I want to spend the rest of my life with Jeanette knelt between my knees with my cock in her mouth, I feel it building, threatening and inevitable as day turning to night.
“I’m going to come,” I warn her.
And the minx, I swear she smiles. Her eyes light up and where I thought she liked the feeling of power, I see she’s relishing it.
Even as her inexperienced ministrations tip me over into orgasm, I don’t close my eyes. I keep watching her every tiny expression. I’m never going to forget even one second of this one day when I was lucky enough to have Jeanette Capelle, and she took my soul.
I see her surprise the moment my seed hits the back of her throat and fills her mouth. I’m nearly undone by her slow smile as she tastes me and then swallows every drop. She feels naughty doing that, and fuck, but so do I. Defiling my girl like this.
Before my cock has stopped twitching and pulsing, I reach and grab her under her slight arms, dragging her up my body to kiss her. My cock is lewdly pressed between our clothes, and she stiffens in alarm before melting into me as I thread my fingers into her hair as I always wanted to, and press our mouths together.
A sweet kiss. Our first real kiss. Gentle and delicate after the intensity of what we’ve done. I breathe in her honey and rose scent and try to tell her with my kiss all the words I dare not say aloud.
I love you.
I can’t let you go.
You’re mine.
Then I hold her tight as I flip her onto her back and slide down her body. The understanding between us is so pure, she knows what I’m going to do. She wriggles out of her jeans and knickers and fuck, when she spreads her legs wide with only a touch from my hands to push her knees apart, I fall on her.
There’s no pretence. I lick her like I’m starving. I might have just come, but my need for her is undiminished. I’m merciless in the pursuit of her quaking under my tongue. I feast and I’m not easy on her. I use my fingers, curling them into her passage and pistoning them in and out. She’s soaking wet, dripping with need and I push her without stopping, hard and harder on that little bud, listening to her moans and cries. I band my arm over her pelvis when she starts to shake, holding her down. I won’t let her escape even one bit of the pleasure I’m going to overwhelm her with.
It doesn’t take long and my chest expands with satisfaction when I feel her clench around the fingers I’m thrusting into her. When I think of how this is a first for her I’m hard again.
Afterwards, I carry her to my bathroom. It’s a herculean effort when we’re both under the sluicing hot water, soapy and clean and wet, not to do anything but worship her breasts with my mouth and make her come again on my fingers. The roar of my achingly hard cock is as unrelenting as the water.
I ignore it. And though she casts curious eyes down at my erection, she doesn’t object when I guide her hand from me. But she looks at me like I’m a puzzle she’s trying to figure out. I don’t know how many times I can cope with coming with her until I’ll snap and demand entrance to her pussy. Or just take it.
I feed her—thankfully my amazing housekeeper left plenty of meals in the fridge. Jeanette oohs over everything she finds and spends ten straight minutes dithering between her two favourites. She says it’s a Libra thing. I tell her it’s an Aries thing that she should just have both, and she laughs. I stand behind her with my hands on her hips as she decides.
I don’t remind her of the other decision she needs to make. If two lunch options consume so much of her time, how will she ever choose about the fate of living, breathing, people?
We decide on a film for the afternoon, and she cuddles into me on the sofa like I’m her favourite armchair. It’s a thriller with a heavy dollop of romance, and I pause the film when there’s a gun on screen and explain how to remove the safety and the recoil to expect when it fires. An acknowledgement of the continued teacher role I promised her.
She’s silent for a while. It’s all too easy to kid myself this is a normal weekend for us. This is what we do, her and me. Give each other orgasms and stick together like a mated pair.
I assume she’s forgotten about the truths she wanted as well as the help with fighting off threats. Until she says that a scene in the film reminds her of her school, and I reply that, yes, it looks like Switzerland and she suddenly sits up, snatches the remote and the screen goes black.
Her eyebrows pinch together.
“How do you know I was at school in Switzerland? I was the lost princess.”
