“Oh my God, I’m so glad to see you!”
Cara lets out a gasp of relief as she tumbles over the doorstep and wraps me up in a huge hug. I squeeze her back, and just for a moment, I feel a rush of gratitude that she’s still in my life, even after everything that has happened.
She pulls back and looks me up and down, as though I might still be bearing some of the physical wounds of what I went through—but by now, three weeks later, there’s nothing left. Hell, they hardly did any real damage to me in the first place. Most of the harm that has taken place is contained inside my head right now, and that’s where I want it to stay.
“I’m so sorry I couldn’t come see you sooner,” she continues, the words tumbling out of her in a rush. “I was on this trip for work, interviewing a—well, it doesn’t matter, I’m just so sorry this is the first I’ve seen of you since it all went down.”
“It’s fine,” I soothe her as best I can. I can tell the guilt is threatening to get the better of her, and that’s the last thing either of us needs right now. No, what matters is that I’m okay, that she’s okay, and that everything is behind me, once and for all.
“I couldn’t believe it when you called me that night,” she murmurs, as she steps inside, crossing her arms over her chest and shaking her head. “I hadn’t heard from you in a couple of days, but I thought you were just busy with Polly…oh, I should have done something sooner…”
“You couldn’t have done anything,” I remind her. “Those assholes, the ones who took me, it’s not like they would have just let me go. You would have gotten yourself in trouble too, and you know I could never live with myself if something happened to you—”
The thought of it makes my voice catch in my throat. God, I’m still so emotional over everything—I need to pull myself together, but it feels nigh-on impossible after the stress of it all, the threat of what lingered over my head during that time.
“You’re right,” she sighs, planting a hand on her chest to calm herself. “I’m just…glad you’re safe. And that Polly is too. Where is she?”
“She’s sleeping,” I reply. “Should be awake in an hour or so, if you want to stick around to see her…”
“Are you kidding? Of course I do,” she replies with a small smile. “I’m here to catch up with her…”
I chuckle as I make us both a coffee—it’s a little strange, being back in this apartment again, after so long living with Luca. But I knew that when I saw Cara again I would want to be in my own space, on my own turf.
We settle on the couch, and she reaches over to give my knee a squeeze.
“How have you been coping with everything?” she asks softly, her voice laced with concern.
“I think…I think about as well as I could be expected to,” I reply, managing to lighten my tone to reassure her slightly. “It was…it was really scary. But it’s behind me now, and at least it means that those other women who were trapped were able to get a chance at a new life.”
She nods, her lips pressed together with concern. I told her about everything I saw when I was taken—spilling the details about the compound where I and the rest of the women were held—the words spilling out of me because I knew I needed to get them off my chest. She did her best to make me feel better about everything, but truth be told, I didn’t really start to relax until I heard that they were all set free.
As the Maglione kingdom has fallen, plenty of those women needed to be set free—Luca has been overseeing it in the city, while his father is handling it back in his hometown. I don’t know how he’s found the time to keep on top of all of that, when I know he’s juggling his shifts at the hospital with spending time with Polly and me, but I get the feeling it’s best not to ask too much about it.
Luca has heard some stories about what they went through, I’m sure of it—a few times, he’s made reference to them, as though he’s all too aware that it could have been me on the wrong end of those narratives. I don’t enquire any further. I can barely make sense of what has happened to me, let alone what was waiting for me if things hadn’t gone the way they did…
“You helped with that, didn’t you?” she prompts me, and I wave my hand.
“Not really,” I reply. “Just…gave them some information about what I remembered. Nothing they couldn’t have figured out themselves, most likely.”
“But it still helped,” she reminds me, giving my hand a tight squeeze. “You did more than a lot of people would have been able to. They would have wanted to leave all of this behind, but you didn’t do that, not until they were out. That’s something to be proud of.”
I look up at her with a smile. Sometimes, I’m reminded of just how lucky I am to have her as a friend.
“Thank you,” I whisper. “That means a lot.”
“Anytime.”
For a moment, she lets me gather myself, before I turn to the main topic of conversation—the reason I invited her here in the first place. Because, in the weeks I’ve been spending with Luca, a question has been hanging over my head, a question that I know needs an answer. And just yesterday, he came to me and told me that he wanted me to return to the city with him.
I need advice—I need someone to help me put this in perspective. Because I know, with all the emotions running through my veins right now, there isn’t a chance in hell that I’m going to be able to make a smart choice when it comes to him.
“I actually…uh, there was actually something I wanted to talk to you about,” I begin, haltingly.
She tips her head to the side, raising her eyebrows. “Oh, yeah?”
“About…about something Luca said to me.”
Her eyes flicker with concern. I know she’s still far from convinced by Luca’s presence in my life—especially after what happened. I don’t blame her, but I need her to understand how much he means to me—how much I want him to stay a part of my life, even if it means traveling a path I never thought I would.
“What has he been saying to you?” she asks. I almost laugh at her tone of voice.
“Hey, he hasn’t threatened me or anything,” I assure her, raising my eyebrows at her.
She shakes her head. “Sorry, I just—I’m just a little protective of you right now. You can’t blame me, with everything that’s happened…”
“I don’t,” I assure her. “But he asked me—he told me that he’s going back to his home city soon enough. And he wants Polly and me to come with him.”
Her face starts—I can tell it’s not what she was expecting. She swallows hard, her eyes darting back and forth, before she finally replies.
“And are you thinking of going with him?”
I let out a long breath. Now, there’s the question I can’t seem to wrap my head around.
Am I going to leave with him? I don’t know.
“I think so,” I confess, finally. “I mean, I guess I didn’t shut him down the moment he said it, so there must be at least a part of me that likes the idea…”
“Jesus,” she murmurs, tearing her gaze away from me. “This is…a lot, Katie. A whole hell of a lot.”
“I know,” I reply, apologetic. “I didn’t mean to dump it all on you. I just…I need to know if this is as crazy an idea as it sounds to me.”
“Leaving to live with the heir to some mafia empire?” she exclaims. “Yeah, I think it’s fair to say that sounds pretty crazy…”
She lifts a hand, steadying herself, and shakes her head.
“No,” she says, more to herself than to me. “No, I know you’re not stupid. And if this man has you feeling as though this is what you want, then there must be a reason for that. There has to be.”
I press my lips together, and I can’t help but smile. It’s so good to hear her on my side—even willing to consider it.
“So, tell me,” she begins, raising her eyebrows at me pointedly, “what are the pros and cons to this?”
“The cons,” I begin, my mind darting to the worst-case scenario, as it often does. “Are that he’s…who he is. That he’s part of the family that he is. And that, whether I like it or not, my daughter is too, and she’s probably going to be pulled into it one way or another.”
“And that you got kidnapped weeks after he came back into your life,” she reminds me. “Don’t forget that.”
“Oh, I’m not…”
“Good. Because I’m never going to,” she warns me. I can tell she’s not kidding around—she doesn’t, when it comes to matters of her friend’s safety.
“But the pros…the pros are worth considering too.”
“Oh, yeah?” She prompts me with a look. “And what are they, exactly?”
“That I enjoy being with him,” I begin, slowly. “That he seems to like me a lot. And that he’s great with Polly, that he’s kind, that he’s thoughtful, that he’s brave when it comes to—”
“When it comes to the matter of saving you from some mess that he put you in the middle of in the first place,” she finishes up for me.
“Yeah, that,” I reply, with a slight grimace. “But he still did it. And I know he’ll do it again—I know this isn’t just some passing thing for him. He’s dedicated. He’s spent his whole life protecting his family, and now that Polly and I are a part of that, I know we’ve earned that protection too.”
“But do you want to be with someone who makes it so you have to be protected?” she asks. “Is it…is he worth that? And what about your career…?”
“I don’t have a career here, not anymore,” I reply, shaking my head. “It’s been taking me a long time to come to terms with that, but…but it’s true. I had something before I got pregnant, but now, I don’t think anyone’s going to look at me the same way again. You know how people feel about hiring single mothers at the best of times, let alone one who dropped out in the middle of a campaign…”
She grimaces and nods. “But does that mean you’re just going to leave all of it behind?” she asks. “I know how passionate you are about politics, that’s how we became friends in the first place. I can’t imagine you just never giving that part of yourself space to thrive again.”
“See, that’s the thing,” I remark, tipping my head to the side thoughtfully. “I…I don’t think I have to, not if I go with him.”
“You think you can get into politics in another city…?”
“Not through the route I was planning to take up here,” I admit. “But there are other ways to make a change. Other ways to exercise power. And if I’m part of a family like Luca’s, I can use that to change the world for the better. And I won’t have to go through all the bullshit that I would in actual politics, right?”
She raises her eyebrows. “Damn, girl,” she remarks. “You’ve really thought of it all, huh?”
“Yeah,” I reply, feeling an excited flush come to my cheeks. “Seeing what those women went through, I realized that there’s so much more out there that needs our attention. Shit that the legitimate world tries to pretend doesn’t exist, but that doesn’t make it any less real for the people who are in the middle of it. The mafia are the ones who do this shit—so it’s the mafia who can make it stop.”
I let out a long breath when I’m done. Now that I’ve said it out loud, I’m certain that the choice has been made for me. It’s not just that I want to be with Luca because I’m falling for him, because I care for him, because I want him to be part of his daughter’s life—no, it’s because I can make a great life for myself out there, even if it’s not the one I pictured myself living.
“You should go,” Cara tells me, and I notice all at once that her eyes are blurry with tears.
“Oh God, don’t cry,” I plead with her, laughing to try and hold back my own emotion. “I…I don’t think I can take it if you start crying too!”
She giggles, but the tears begin to fall down her cheeks, and I reach over and pull her into a giant hug. She squeezes me back, rubbing her hand up and down my back.
“I’m going to miss you so much,” she mumbles into my shoulder. “But this is the right thing for you. If you really care about him as much as you say you do…you deserve to have someone love you like that. You deserve everything.”
“Thank you,” I murmur as I pull back. “You’re going to come and visit all the time, right?”
“Are you kidding?” she exclaims. “I’m going to try and get put on a story out there so I can help you with the move. If you think I’m going to let someone move in on the best-aunt territory when it comes to Polly, you’ve got another thing coming…”
I laugh again through my tears—the mixture of emotions is hard to wrap my head around, but hearing her support me in this is everything I needed. It’s going to be hard moving somewhere we can’t see each other as much, but I know she will keep in touch in any way she can. Like me, Cara’s pretty stubborn, and she’s not going to let our friendship slip through her fingers.
“Thank you,” I whisper to her, and she shakes her head.
“You’ve got nothing to thank me for.”
“Of course I do,” I reply. “You’ve always been there for Polly and me. I’ve always been able to rely on you. And I want you to know that you can rely on me too, okay? Anything you need.”
“Well, I’ll try not to fall in love with a mafia don,” she jokes. “But I can’t promise anything.”
I grin at her, and then I hear a slight noise from next door—I glance around.
“Oh, I think that’s Polly awake,” I remark as I get to my feet. “You want to come and see her?”
“Of course I do,” she shoots back, almost incredulous. “I’ve got to get in as much quality time with her as I can…”
And as she brushes past me to lead the way to the bedroom, I smile. This life is going to be hard to leave behind—but the one that lies ahead of me seems even more appealing.
