I shoved through the doors, flashed my badge, and bypassed the front desk.
Trace was on my heels. I hadn’t cared he was coming. He’d tried to ask, to make sure on the scramble to get dressed and get here, but I’d barely reacted.
My mom. Get to my mom. That was my only concern, and now we were here, and I was racing down the hallway toward where she’d be kept. I’d been here enough times that the staff knew me by name.
I skidded to a halt, seeing one of the senior-most nurses on staff. She held up a hand. “Whoa there, Je—” She stopped, seeing who was coming right behind me. Her head straightened up, and she stood a little taller. “Fancy seeing you here.” Her eyes darted to me and back again. “And with law enforcement.”
Trace’s hand came to the small of my back as he stepped to my side. “How’s her mother, Sloane?”
She didn’t answer at first, her eyes falling down to where he was touching me and back up again, then to me before slowing sliding once more to him. “No disrespect, Trace, but I have to say that I’m not approving of this situation.”
His hand pressed harder to me, and the side of his body pressed against mine. I could feel his tension. “Why don’t you save the judgment and tell us how her mother is?”
“She’s alive.” Her tone gentled, and she took a step back before turning and indicating we should follow her. “Call came in from the ambulance, so we were ready. Patrick was with her, and he had the bottle of what she ingested too.” She moved to a room and pulled back the curtain, and a startled cry left me before I could clamp down on my emotions.
My mom was in bed. She was intubated, her skin with an unhealthy pallor.
She looked so small, like she could’ve been sixteen.
Trace stepped up even closer, holding me upright before my knees firmed. I gave him a nod before pushing off and approaching the bed. Her hand was peeking out from the blanket. I looked, but no one else was here. “Where—”
“Pat must’ve stepped out. He was here earlier.”
Pat was Bear’s first name. Or Patrick. I forgot some people preferred to use that name. Never made sense to me.
I nodded, suddenly so fucking tired. “He called, said she was stable.”
“She is. She was. She’ll be just fine. They administered Narcan. She’s just sleeping it off now. She’ll be sore when she wakes, but you know the drill.”
Because I’d seen this before with parolees. Too many times to count.
I moved to the chair by the bed and took my mom’s hand in mine, and I laid my forehead next to it. If I could’ve crawled in bed with her, I would’ve, but only while she was like this. The second she woke, I had no doubt it’d be back to the norm. Hateful words and loathing feelings. Blame all around. Same old, same old.
But right now, she looked vulnerable and peaceful.
My heart constricted. What did that say about me that I wished she could look like this a little longer before her fighting spirit lit her alive once again?
“You have got to be kidding me?”
A new voice, a new arrival. One that wasn’t happy.
I lifted my head—everything in me was so heavy—and I saw Leo standing with two coffees in hand. He was glaring at Trace before jerking his gaze to find me, then my mother. His gaze softened just a tad before going back to Trace and hardening all over again. “Get the fuck out of here, West. I won’t give you another chance, or the handcuffs are getting pulled out.”
“He’s with me, Leo.”
My boss, mentor, and second dad swung his gaze my way. The soft look was gone. He barreled in, sweeping past Trace and Sloane, and put one of the coffees on the nightstand. He went to my mom’s other side before turning and facing back at them. “Get out. Now.”
Trace ignored him, looking to me. “You need anything?”
I scanned the room, taking in everyone’s stances. Sloane seemed caught, which didn’t make sense to me, but my mom was here. She was sleeping. I was okay right now.
I said as much to him, still holding her hand. “Gonna stay a bit.” I gestured to Leo. “Have a talk.”
His eyes lifted to Leo, who was barely keeping it together. He was huffing. “If I had a fucking shovel with me, you’d already be dead, West. Get out of here. I say it one more time, and I don’t care whose gun gets drawn. You feel me?”
Trace took him in before his eyes shifted to me. “Call me if you need something. I mean it. Anything.”
I nodded, and his eyes darkened.
I wanted him to come over, press a kiss to me or at least smooth a hand back over my hair, but he didn’t. Not yet. And judging by his reluctance, he wanted to do the same, but it was too soon. I watched Leo as Trace left and heard Sloane comment, quietly, “That one never ceases to amaze me. Okay, folks. Jess. Leo. I’m on staff today, so I’m here if you need anything. In the meantime, I’ll tell the doc you both are here and wanting an update.”
No sooner had she left before I heard from across the bed, “You screwing the Mafia now?”
“Way to not judge and wait for a time to do some proper questioning. Good call, Leo. I’m real inclined to explain my bedmate to you now.”
“You better explain. I’m your boss.”
“And my mom is lying in a hospital bed from an overdose while you and Bear told me I was ‘off the hook.’”
“She’s an alcoholic.”
“Exactly. An alcoholic. Not a drug addict. She overdosed, Leo. What the fuck is that about?”
The curtains slid back, and this time, the voice I’d been expecting spoke up. “Oh, whoa. Whoa. Whoa! I could hear you two halfway down the hallway.” Bear came in, a bag of food in hand. He took me in, took in my hand holding my mom’s, and took in Leo before coming around to my side. He put the bag on the other stand, came up, and gave me a half hug. Smoothing a hand down my head, he leaned down and gave me a kiss to the forehead. “Hey, kiddo. How are you holding up?”
Leo made an exasperated sound, sitting back and shaking his head. He pinched his fingers at the bridge of his nose. “You have no idea who came in here with her.”
I reached up, catching Bear’s hand and giving it a small squeeze, but I wouldn’t let go of my mom’s with my other one. “I’m tired but okay as long as she’s going to pull through.”
He nodded, a sad smile pulling at the ends of his mouth. “I bet.” He shot Leo a hard look over my head. “And I can imagine because I saw him coming out of here. We had a word.”
I tensed, tipping my head back. “You had a word with Tristian West?”
He met my gaze, arching an eyebrow up. “I had a word with Trace West. I remember him from the neighborhood. He’s not the man his uncle or pops were. I know that much.” He was looking around before he headed back to the curtain. “I’ll be back. Going to get myself a chair. You two better not kill each other until I get back.” He pointed at both of us before slipping out.
“Trace?” Leo snapped at me. “I wasn’t surprised you used the name, but Bear too? Maybe I need to get on a nickname basis with the future head of the West Mafia family. Or is he currently the head, according to a recent news article?”
Bear’s lack of reaction didn’t surprise me. He was smart and kind. He was also patient before he made up his mind about something. Leo’s quick reaction also didn’t surprise me. I would’ve reacted the same, but it was what it was. I made my choice tonight. I’d known what I was deciding, and I’d meant it when I’d decided to let the cards fall how they were going to fall.
But right now, in this room, Trace and I weren’t the pressing matter.
I sat back in my chair, not letting go of my mom’s hand. “Tell me what happened.”
It was a little later when Bear came back, a chair in hand.
He sat just as soon as the doctor came in too.
We were all updated.
My mom had overdosed on painkillers, and while they believed she’d make a full recovery, a social worker would be assessing her.
He gave us all a hard look. “This was a suicide attempt. Let’s be very clear on that. She will be moved over to the psych unit once she’s stable. If you’re not on board with her mental health team, then she could do this again. I was told the nurses overheard an argument in here already. My advice? Get on the same team regarding Mrs. Montell, and then do what you need to do to get her on board. The more cooperative she is with her mental health team, the better results you can expect. Now. Let’s hope Mrs. Montell wakes up with a renewed outlook on life, but considering the looks each of you has, I’m guessing that likelihood is slim. Good luck, Officers.”
He left and left a pregnant pause of silence in his wake.
Leo let out a sigh, returning to his chair and taking the second coffee with him. “I told her what happened, Bear.”
“Goddamn,” Bear roared. “Why’d you do that? I told her we had this covered.”
Leo rolled his eyes, but I was the one who got in Bear’s face.
“You were kind to me minutes ago, but now I know the real reason, and do not think for a second that you’re off the hook.”
Roles switched real quick because Leo informed me that they hadn’t been checking on my mother like they’d let me believe. They’d given her an ultimatum after she’d fallen off the wagon once again, which I knew she would do, because she’d been doing it for half of my life.
Bear held up his hands, a frustrated sound escaping him. “We—she doesn’t listen to reason. We tried. We did. She—she’s not going to change until she hits rock bottom.”
“So you thought to speed it up by abandoning her? What’d you do? Get my phone and block her from my own phone so she couldn’t contact me? You know she would’ve since you both weren’t taking her calls.”
I was reeling, my mind whirling over what they’d just shared they’d done.
It wasn’t drugs. It was a suicide attempt.
My mother . . . what had I done? I’d let them take over for me. I’d let them. I hadn’t fought—I’d abandoned her.
It took me a little bit before I clued in that neither answered me. I looked at them. Both weren’t looking at me either.
“What?” I ground out.
Bear firmly wouldn’t meet my gaze, but Leo did, and for the first time I saw a softening from him. “We didn’t block her from your phone, Jess.”
He didn’t finish saying the rest of the statement.
My knees gave out, and I reached out for the bed, and I fell into the chair behind me.
My mom had never called me. She hadn’t tried. She’d, just . . .
