Heat spread out across my chest, my heart pounding. It was like he was literally sculpted by God himself. Tanned skin. Hard, defined lines. Bulging muscles. Chiselled abs.
I’d always had a serious weakness for Nikolai’s chest. One look was all it took to make tears run down my thighs. Add in the ‘T’ tattooed over his heart and I was so fucking close to crumbling right there. To intentionally losing every round so I’d wind up naked in front of him.
I had no one else to blame but myself. By agreeing to the game, I’d put myself in exactly the position I was trying desperately to avoid.
That was Future Tatiana’s problem, though. Present Tatiana was going to take full advantage and let FT handle the repercussions.
Nikolai’s muscles flexed as he reached across the table to grab the cards. “You sure you want to keep playing?”
“I’m not the one who just lost.”
He smirked. “Right.”
I narrowed my eyes suspiciously. He knew how much I loved his chest. Looking at it. Touching it. Licking it…the fucker lost on purpose. Probably to try and distract me. Well, he was going to pay for that.
“What’s your dare?” he asked as he lazily shuffled the cards, a very smug look on his face. Any dare I chose would be a reward for him too. What could I make him do that would drive him crazy?
I pushed my chair out a little so I was away from the table. Nikolai watched me carefully, every shred of his focus on me as I straightened my leg out.
“Lick up my leg until I tell you to stop.”
He didn’t move at first, staring me dead in the eyes. I recognised that dark, feral look. It was a very, very dangerous game we were playing. And I didn’t fucking care.
Nikolai got to his feet slowly and walked over to me. He dropped to his knees at my feet and stared at my leg admiringly. His rough, calloused hands wrapped around my ankle, lifting it into the air. He used a soft, light touch, those strong, powerful hands capable of so many dangerous things holding me with such tenderness and care. It made me fucking burn, pressure building in my pussy.
He leant forward and kissed the base of my ankle.
My breath hitched.
I felt his tongue next, running leisurely up my leg. My whole body was on fire, lit up like a fucking Christmas tree. I started to squirm, the overwhelming urge to grind against something making it impossible for me to stay still.
Fuck, this was a bad idea, I thought.
His tongue was wet and warm and, when I pictured it on my clit, I swear I could have come right there and then.
His hand snapped out, gripping my other thigh and he roughly pushed my legs further apart as he moved up and up, his tongue dragging over my hypersensitive skin. Fuck…shit….fuck. He pushed my shorts up out of the way as he continued to go higher.
“Stop,” I panted when he reached the apex of my thighs.
He stopped immediately, but kept his tongue pressed to my skin, staring up my body from between my legs. His eyes were dilated, his pupils swallowing almost the entirety of that beautiful, crystal blue. He looked at me with this savage, hungry look, like he wanted to eat me alive, to take a bite out of my skin.
I licked my lips, my chest rising and falling hard as I tried to catch my breath. “Your deal,” I whispered, my heart slamming in my chest.
He moved his face away and got to his feet, standing over me. Little Nicky was standing to attention, straining in his grey sweatpants, every glorious inch on display.
“You better hope you don’t lose the next round,” he rumbled, his voice deep and thick.
I smiled. “Same to you.” What I had planned next would make him snap. I was sure of it.
He returned to his seat and dealt out the next round, his movements stiff.
My hand was shit. Not even a single pair. I got rid of four cards, which wasn’t a good look and showed I had shit all.
Nikolai gave me a feral smile. He dumped two, and dealt out the replacement cards. I watched him carefully for tells, but Nikolai was hard to read on a normal day. There were high stakes in this game. So, it was virtually impossible to try and read him now.
“I bet pants.”
I looked at my cards. I now had two pairs. Not a bad hand, but not necessarily a great one, either.
I could match, and probably lose, or raise it. Bluff the shit out of him and hope he folded.
Go big or go home.
“Raise. Pants and underwear.”
He arched an eyebrow. He glanced at his cards and then back to me, calculation in his gaze. I put on a calm, casual air, hoping he would see it as me being confident in my cards. I should have known better though. Nikolai could read me like a fucking book.
“Match.”
Shit.
He showed me his cards first and I wanted to pull my damn hair out. I wasn’t a big sore loser, like Illayana. But still, I didn’t like to lose. Nobody did.
He had three 7s and two Ks—a full house. His full house beat my shitty two-pair any day.
The wolfish smirk on his face sent my heart racing. He leant back, casual as you please, and waited, his fingers tapping lightly on the table. I wasn’t the type to back out. I got to my feet and didn’t hesitate to pull my shorts and underwear down, stepping out of them.
Nikolai’s whole body locked in place. He was deathly still, his eyes plastered to my pussy. I couldn’t blame him. I kept my girl clean and very well groomed. Water and pineapple were a part of my daily diet.
“Turn around,” he commanded harshly.
“Is that your dare?” I asked, my tone light, playful.
“More like a polite request.”
“A request usually comes with the word ‘please’.”
“You don’t like it when I use the word ‘please’. It’s too soft for you. Turn the fuck around.”
Goosebumps broke out over my entire body. He was right. In this context, I didn’t like when he said “please”. I craved that rough, dominating side of his personality in moments like this. Where he told me what to do, what to say, when I could come.
But you can bet your ass that if this was any other scenario—like him asking me to make him a sandwich or something—he better damn well use the word “please”. Otherwise, I’d cut his balls off and hang them on my Christmas tree as decorations.
I turned slowly, giving him plenty of time to admire the view. When I faced him again, his hands were clenched into fists, squeezing so hard that his knuckles turned white. It was like he was using all his strength to keep his hands right where they were.
His eyes were wild. Full of hunger and desperation. I liked it when he was desperate. He was more savage then.
“Your dare,” he started, cracking his neck. “Sit on the table with your legs spread wide, facing me. I want a good look at that pretty pink pussy. My pretty pink pussy.”
Oh, you—
That was a good one. A really good one. Lucky for me, and I guess him, there wasn’t a shred of self-consciousness left in my body. Nikolai had fucked those thoughts right out of me.
For the whole time we were together, and even well after, he showered me with compliments. They weren’t always about my appearance either. He complimented my mind. My resilience. The loyalty I had for those I cared about.
I climbed up onto the table, scooching forward until I was right in front of him, and spread my legs as far as they could go, giving him a completely unobstructed view.
His heated gaze was locked firmly on my pussy and I trembled. The look he was giving me made me so fucking wet, it was literally dripping out of me onto the table.
I was so turned on, I could barely breathe.
Nikolai leant forward and swiped his finger through the small puddle of my wetness, bringing it to his lips. “Your deal,” he rumbled, sucking it into his mouth.
My clit throbbed. I’d never been so desperate for him before. For his cock. His tongue. For fucking everything.
I gathered up the cards and shuffled them, all while Nikolai continued to taste my wetness with his finger like it was the most delicious thing he’d ever had before. The more he did it, the more turned on I got.
He’d better hope I lose this round, because I am going to make him suffer.
I dealt the hand. We dumped the cards we didn’t want and I gave the replacements. We placed our bets. My shirt against his pants.
He won and I smashed my fist down on the table.
I said I wasn’t a big sore loser, not that I wasn’t one.
After whipping off my shirt, I sat there in all my naked glory. Well, except for the pair of fluffy socks on my feet. His tongue ran over his lips as he stared at my breasts. My nipples hardened under his gaze.
“Do something you’ve been holding back from doing,” he said, voice low.
I frowned. Something I’ve been holding back from doing?
The look on his face taunted me to do something daring, and I was never one to back down from a dare. There was one thing I’d been dying to do since the moment he’d taken off his shirt, and now I could do it under the preface of a dare.
Win fucking win.
I scooted to the edge of the table and pushed off, standing in between his legs. He watched me like I was the only person in his world. The hottest, most sexiest thing he’d ever seen in his life. It set my insides on fire.
His gaze trailed over every inch of my skin. Slowly. Methodically. Admiringly. With every shred of his focus. A level five earthquake couldn’t shake his focus right now.
My hands moved, gripping his muscular thighs as I lowered myself down to my knees. His nostrils flared, his body staying as still as a statue. Anticipation shone in his darkened eyes. I dragged the moment out a little, letting that anticipation build higher and higher until he started to squirm, eager to find out what the fuck I was going to do.
A smirk on my face, I leant forward and ran my tongue through his chiselled abs and up his herculean chest. He groaned, his head tipping back as I continued going up and up, dragging my tongue up the middle of his throat and flicking it over his chin. Nikolai breathed hard, his body trembling underneath me. The fact that I could affect him so much to the point where he was literally shaking made me feel so fucking powerful.
We were face to face, our lips barely an inch away from each other. Our gazes were locked, so focused on one another, like we were the only two people in the world.
I felt like I could stay like that forever, lost in his smouldering blue eyes. Time seemed to stand still, and I never wanted it to end.
“Is it my deal, or yours? I honestly can’t remember,” he breathed heavily, staring at my mouth.
I smirked. “Yours.” I straightened my spine, standing tall and his eyes snapped to my breasts, suddenly directly in front of him.
“This game is going to kill me,” he choked out, licking his lips like he wished they were my nipples.
My smirk turned into a full-blown smile. “Not yet. We’re not done.” I dragged my fingers over his hard chest as I turned around and went back to my chair, sitting down.
Nikolai cleared his throat, trying to adjust himself discreetly before reaching for the cards. Despite the uncomfortable look on his face, I could see his mood had improved. I was so fucking glad for it.
I couldn’t even describe the feeling that washed over me when I saw how tense he was, staring at his laptop as if it held all the answers to his problems. I knew how stressed he was. How hopeless he felt about not being able to find his father. All I wanted to do was make him feel better. To take him out of that dark place in his mind and pull him some place lighter. Just because he wasn’t there for me when I needed him the most, didn’t mean I wouldn’t be there for him when he needed me.
I would do anything to ease the emotional suffering he was going through then and there. Even put myself in a position I knew I’d probably regret later.
He dealt out the next hand. I picked up my cards, excitement flooding my veins when I saw them. Nikolai was great at picking up my tells, so I tried as hard as I could to remain nonchalant so he wouldn’t pick anything up.
“Last bet,” he said, dealing out the replacement cards. He only had his pants and underwear left, and I was naked except for the socks on my feet.
The stripping part was only a precursor, a stepping stone before the real fun began.
The dares.
We still played even when we both ran out of clothes. The object of the game was to make the other person snap. Lose their control. I was the reigning champion, and that was quite simply because I knew exactly what it took to make Nikolai break.
I flipped my cards first. Royal flush. Nikolai’s brows raised in slight surprise. He didn’t even bother showing me his hand, knowing damn well he couldn’t beat it.
He got to his feet and removed his sweats, leaving him in a pair of black boxer briefs. His thighs were mountainous; huge and overflowing with muscle. The nickname “Thunder Thighs” suited him well (I should know, I came up with it).
Then there was the snake in his underwear. Or, more accurately, the can of pringles, because that was how big and thick the damn thing was. It was fucking monstrous.
Nikolai spread his arms out wide. “Want me to turn for you?”
I laughed and twirled my finger through the air. “Go on then.”
He kept his arms outstretched and spun slowly, giving me plenty of time to enjoy the masterpiece of his body. I definitely did.
He faced me again, a devilish smirk on his lips.
There were so many different sides to Nikolai. His rough, dominating side. His vicious side. His take-no-bullshit side. But this one? His carefree, playful side? It was my favourite. Without a doubt.
It was a side of himself that he held back from others. He showed a little bit of it to his siblings, but even then, it was still partially stuck behind this impenetrable wall of restraint. I’d seen it more times than I could count.
“Your dare,” he challenged, remaining standing.
I already knew what it was that I was going to do. I got to my feet and made my way over to him, adding an extra sway in my hips. Nikolai watched, eyes slightly narrowed in calculation, like he was trying to figure out what I was up to.
“I dare you not to lick your lips,” I said, stopping in front of him.
He frowned, confused. “What—” his words cut off when he saw my hand move down between my legs. I slipped 2 fingers inside my drenching pussy and moaned.
“Tati,” he growled in warning.
I just smiled as I pumped them in and out a few times, getting them nice and wet before I held them up in the air right in front of him.
He exhaled heavily, staying deathly still as I rubbed my wetness all over his lips. His jaw tensed, his eyes as fierce and savage as I’d ever seen them before, like a wild beast poised to strike.
“Are you ready to give up yet, moya lyubov’?” My love?” I whispered, sucking my finger into my mouth. The endearment slipped out before I could stop it.
I wasn’t sure what it was that finally made him snap. Whether it was my wetness on his lips, me sucking it off my finger or the fact that I’d called him something I hadn’t called him in two years. Maybe it was a combination of all three. I didn’t know, and I didn’t fucking care. The point was, he’d snapped.
He took me, slamming me down onto the table with a bruisingly punishing kiss. He pushed his tongue into my mouth and moaned, gripping my face roughly as I kissed him back. His hands were everywhere, touching every inch of my skin. He tugged on my nipples. Pulled my hair back to bite the side of my neck. Held me with a punishing grip that no doubt left bruises on my skin. I fucking lived for it.
“Tell me I can have you,” he begged, kissing me hard. “Please, Tati. Tell me I can have you.”
“Yes, Nikolai, yes. Take me. I want you so fucking bad.”
“Thank fuck.” He licked down my neck and sealed his lips around my nipple, sucking hard. He palmed my other breast and squeezed. “Fuck, I’ve missed you. I’ve missed you so fucking much. My beautiful love,” he rasped, moving his hands down.
Despite how much my heart swelled at his words, I knew it was wrong, that I couldn’t do that to him. It wasn’t fair to give him false hope that something more could blossom from it when I knew it couldn’t.
There was no denying the attraction we shared. The connection, not only physically but mentally. Emotionally. But I still didn’t trust him. Not with my heart.
“Wait, wait, wait.”
He stopped instantly, his hands freezing on my hips. “What’s wrong?” he asked, looking at me.
I swallowed nervously. “You know that this will just be sex, right? That it won’t be anything more?”
His brows slammed down into a frown. “What?”
I sighed, guilt filling me. “Nikolai—”
He pushed away from me and took three steps back.
I sat up quickly, reaching for him. “Wait, we don’t have to stop. I just wanted to make it clear.”
“Oh, you have. You’ve made it very clear,” he said numbly.
“Nikolai, please. Don’t be mad.”
“I’m not mad, Tati.” He picked up his clothes and started putting them back on.
“You’re not?”
“No.” He didn’t look mad, and I knew Nikolai well enough to know when he was angry, so I was inclined to believe him. But he was definitely something.
“Then what are you doing?” I asked, watching him closely. “We don’t have to stop. We can still have fun.”
He chuckled humourlessly. “I don’t just want to have fun with you, Tati.” He stood in front of me fully clothed, looking at me with complete and utter seriousness. “I want all of you. I want every single part of you, not just your body or the parts you’re only willing to give. I want everything. The good, the bad and every beautiful, precious moment in between. You’re not ready to give that to me now, and I understand. I do. I broke your trust and you’re scared to let me back in. But hear me now, Tatiana Vera Andreeva. I will never stop trying to get back what we had. What I destroyed. I will wait my entire fucking life for you. Because you’re worth every single second of that wait, no matter how agonising it is.”
