Anton
This isn’t how I wanted it to be.
A month’s worth of tension has piled up between Eileen and me, causing a certain amount of distrust to fill the room whenever we’re together. Physically, we’re a perfect match. She’s the yin to my yang and then some. She’s got me hooked on her magic, and I can’t get enough of her. I’ve yet to tell her this, but the mere sight of her and that beautiful, growing, round baby bump fills me with nothing but joy and excitement.
I can’t make the most of it, though. I can’t enjoy the pregnancy, nor can I truly open up to her. Hell, I doubt I even deserve a woman like Eileen.
“Dr. Hartman will see you now.” A perky-looking nurse comes into the waiting room, snapping me out of my thoughts. She leads us down the hall into the ultrasound room. Once inside, she helps Eileen onto the table and then turns on the machine.
We barely spoke on the way over. In bed, we’re in flawless sync. Out of bed, it feels like we’re strangers stuck together by the laws of civil union.
“Good morning, Mr. and Mrs. Karpov,” Dr. Hartman greets us as he walks in.
“What did the blood tests say?” I ask, skipping past the introductions, as always.
“Everything is looking good so far,” he says with a gentle smile. “I’m glad to see those prenatal vitamins are keeping her minerals in check. The numbers are in both the mother’s and baby’s favor.”
“Is there anything else we should be doing in the second trimester?”
Eileen scowls at me. “I’m right here, you know. You don’t have to speak as if I’m not in the room.”
The pregnancy hormones and having to stay home have my wife on a razor-sharp edge. There are good days, and then there are awful days. I do my best to keep her head above water, yet sometimes I can still feel her slipping away. What we have is fragile enough, already.
“My apologies,” I reply. “Dr. Hartman, please, tell my darling wife what we can expect in the second trimester. I’m merely an observer.”
The doctor laughs lightly. “It’s nice to see a concerned and involved father-to-be.”
Eileen ignores the doctor’s comment and replies, “We would really like to be able to find out the sex today if we could.”
“Alright then, let’s get a sneak peek at the little one,” Dr. Hartman says as he squirts gel on Eileen’s belly and moves the wand around, searching for our baby.
I look at the screen, listening to the hum of the machine, but my gaze soon wanders back to Eileen. I stare at her for a moment. A beauty, even on her worst day. Her long red hair flows loosely over one shoulder. Her green eyes are focused on the screen, and her breath slows as she listens.
Soon, quick successions of thwump, thwump, thwump fill the room. Dr. Hartman gives a soft, “Hmm,” and I notice his eyebrows raise just slightly. Eileen catches it, too.
“What is it? What’s wrong?”
The doctor smiles softly and shakes his head. “Nothing is wrong at all. It’s not uncommon to miss twins during the first ultrasound when they’re still so small—”
“Wait, what? Did you say twins?” I ask in disbelief.
“Yes. Two babies, two strong heartbeats,” Dr. Hartman says. “Here, look at this,” he points to the screen, identifying two different shadows against a grainy background.
“Twins,” I whisper.
It makes sense. Twins run in the family. My father was a twin, my grandmother before him. There’s a set in each generation. I guess it’s my turn now, and I’m elated.
“I’m going to get huge,” Eileen murmurs, tears welling in her eyes. “I already feel ginormous.”
“Honey, you’re beautiful,” I say, gently squeezing her hand. “And I’ll be with you, every step of the way. I can’t carry the twins for you, but I can carry you.”
“You’re going to be fine,” Dr. Hartman says. “I think we should plan for a C-section, though, to remove some of the strain a natural birth can put on your body. In your case, Mrs. Karpova, it is probably the safer option.”
“Yeah, we can do that,” she absently replies.
“You can always change your mind,” the nurse reminds her.
Eileen gives me a wondering look. “Are you okay with that?”
“Honey, it’s your body. You’re doing all of the work. I support you fully, no matter what you decide,” I tell her. “I just want you to be safe, healthy, and happy, so we can raise our twins together.”
“Could you be any more amazing?” She releases a shuddering breath while the nurse cleans her up and the doctor prints a copy of the ultrasound. “This is way more than what I expected.”
“You’re not alone,” I remind her.
“Twins, Anton. We’re having twins.”
“Yeah, I heard.”
I’m overwhelmed, too, but there’s no turning back time—not that I’d want that, anyway. I wouldn’t change a damn thing. I’m right where I need to be, and so is Eileen. One way or another, we’re going to figure this out.
Knowing we’re having twins ups the stakes even more, though. There’s a side of me that has stayed hidden over the past couple of years. I didn’t see a need for unnecessary bloodshed, so I stifled a most primal instinct.
I may have to let the dark side loose again in order to keep my wife and our babies safe.
