Father’s office is cold despite the heatwave this summer. The air conditioning is strong, regardless of his doctor’s order to tune it down. The cold is bad for his heart, and the pains rock his chest most nights.
He doesn’t listen. Just as he isn’t listening to me right now. He’s a stubborn man, just like me.
‘I can’t move in with him, father. What about Lucian?’ I flick a look at my watch and frown. I should be at Amory Corp right now.
But I’m here at my father’s house, in his home office. This seems like a meeting more than a conversation. And I know it’s no mistake that he’s chosen this room to inform me I’m moving into Xander’s house in two days.
Father shrugs but doesn’t hold my eyes. He peers at the bust of himself on his table, a gift from my brother Daniel on his birthday three years ago.
‘He’s bound to find out soon. He’s not stupid. And you’ll never let Lucian stay here.’
How can he ask that? Lucian goes with me. I haven’t severed myself from society for almost six years, only to let him go now.
I glower at him, trying to stop the rampant tremble of my hands, winding one around the other on my lap. ‘Father! This is a contract. We don’t even need to live together.’
‘And what kind of marriage is that? What image does it send of the unity in our ranks if the very head of the Famiglias live in separate homes?’
I squeeze my eyes closed and relax into the seat. He’s right. The marriage is to resolve the feud between our family. Living in separate homes sort of defeats the purpose of the entire thing.
But after last night, the last thing I want to do is be stuck in the same house with Xander. We’ll never be able to keep our hands off each other. And it would be an insane idea, especially with Lucian in that house.
‘What do I do? I can’t help worrying. His family can’t protect me against the extent of his anger. He’s liable to crush them too.’
As he would crush me too.
Xander is a possessive man. Learning I had kept his son and heir away from him this entire time would send him into a blind rage. I open my eyes and latch onto my father’s hard eyes.
He gives me a slight smile of assurance. ‘He won’t. He can’t.’
‘He can. He’ll be wielding control of the Famiglia. He will be able to do all he wants. There will be nothing to stop him this time. And there will be no shade of earth to hide in. Not with us in the same house.’ My heart speeds up, and I swipe a wet palm across the length of my dress.
‘He won’t hurt you, Mel. I would hunt him. Besides, we both know he’s not over you.’ A quick smile tugs at the corner of his lips. ‘Romero says you spent the night at his home.’
There is no reason for the flutter in my stomach or the heat creeping from the corner of my ears to the apples of my cheeks. I splay my hand on the desk and keep my eyes from his.
‘So it’s that way, huh? And you worry? You’ll be fine, Amor.’ He pats my hand on the table.
‘I’m not worried about me, Father. I worry he’ll use Lucian as a chip. Some way to control me. He’s a madman. I refuse to put anything past him.’
The beat in my chest is rising higher and higher, until I feel it would choke me, until I feel I can’t breathe beyond the boulder of fear lurking like a monster in my stomach.
Father waits a moment, dragging in a measure inhale of air so his chest rises and falls. ‘He’s not a monster. He doesn’t need to control you. Have you ever thought me a monster?’
‘Mother didn’t hide your children from you. It might have been a different tale if she had. Imagine the story when everyone finds out.’
I don’t know all the particulars of what goes on when he goes away to ‘work.’ But I am not foolish enough to believe this wouldn’t spin out in some bad press for him.
God. I am just tired of thinking. I want to spend time with my child. I want to hug him good night and have him fall asleep in the safety of my arms. He’s my priority. Anything else is debris in rushing water. It’ll pass.
Even Xander. It doesn’t matter how my body aches for him. How much I seek the caress of his fingers over my skin. It doesn’t matter how he’s already making me feel.
He chuckles, the sound dark and throaty. ‘She didn’t. She wasn’t in your situation. But knowing her, she would’ve done this too.’
I bite my lip and hike my eyebrows. I don’t believe a word he’s saying. ‘Would she? We both know Mother was fearless.’
I wish I had half her strength. Half of the fire of herself. She’d always kept father in line. Had him wound so tight around her finger, she’d become the center of his existence.
‘She was. But so are you.’
My lips are already parting to answer when he holds his hand up in the air and silences me with the spark of anger in them.
‘No arguments Melissa. You go in and get Lucian ready. Amory has already had Rosa pack your bags. You’ll move this evening.’
I tremble, worry, anger and helplessness blooming and spreading like fire in my tight chest.
‘You said I had two days.’
His face is a clean slate. He’s no longer my father. He’s a businessman, telling me as it will be. I’d known there was a reason we were holding this conversation in his study instead of at dinner, where he discussed most family business that concerned his children.
‘Well, you don’t anymore. You’ll keep putting it off. Amory will let Xander know he’ll be expecting you. Go speak to Lucian.’
How do I tell him he will be moving into a house with a man who is his father? How do I explain why I’d left in the first place?
He is a child, but he isn’t stupid. He’ll have questions. He is a person in his own right. He deserves answers.
I nod at Father and yank my hand away from his when he goes to comfort me with what I’m certain is a squeeze.
I can feel the spear of his gaze on my back my entire walk to the door. I feel jittery. Like I can’t think. Caught in a state of limbo.
The walk to Lucian’s room is long, almost as though I’m buying myself time for Father to change his mind, for Xander’s father to decide the Russians weren’t enough of a threat, as though that would help me either way.
When I arrive in Lucian’s room, Hailey is already packing his clothes. Most of it is upended on the bed, large pills of soft cushiony fabrics. He’s jumping on the bed, more interrupting than helping.
I smile when he spies me by the door and comes jumping off the bed.
‘Papi says we’re heading to another house. Do you think it’ll be fun?’ He loops his arms around my neck when I sweep him into my arms.
He smells of baby lotion and his shampoo. Hailey is watching me, her eyes half on the clothes she’s folding carefully into boxes.
I inject a suitable dose of enthusiasm into my voice. I press a long kiss to his forehead, and my arm coils him deeper into my chest.
He’s warm, and his wet hair from a shower tickles my nose. My heart thuds faster. ‘it’s going to be a lot of fun. You’ll love it.’
I hope he does. I plan on protecting him however I can from the tension between Xander and me. He’ll never physically hurt Lucian, but I will never allow him to teach my lovely boy to be as hard and emotionless as his own father has taught him and his siblings to be.
‘Will Uncle Daniel visit?’
‘He better.’
‘And Aunty Gianna?’ He pronounces the name with a slight lisp, his voice producing it as ‘Gi Ana.’
I smile and swing him in my arms, the sound of his laughter calming my heart. Hailey is still watching, folding the clothes faster now without the distraction of Lucian to divide her attention.
‘You’re coming with us, Hailey. Do you mind?’ I watch her face, trying to see if she has any objections in her eyes.
Not everyone is comfortable around Xander. Anyone who has lived here for more than a month knows the Amory family.
I have known the man for years, and yet I still fear his rage.
‘I don’t mind.’ Her words are simple, but the tone she delivers them has me turning away from her, my son tucked into the arch of my hips.
There’s a forlornness to her tone, as though she senses trouble in the air but is choosing to wade through the heat for me. She’s always been that way.
I look down at Lucian in my arms. ‘How about you go let Hailey dress you up? We’ll need to leave soon.’
If Father is right about Rosa being in my room, and I have no doubt that he is, then I want a moment alone with her. Something is obviously happening that he isn’t being completely honest with.
He’d given me two days to move into Xander’s house, then changed his mind at a moment’s notice. How then had Rosa been informed to show up here?
It wasn’t possible. Which meant she’d already been here. Which was either a mistake on his part, or there was never any two days. And just what was the rush?
I let Lucian slide down my hips, watching as he runs back down the hallway, and then I take four slow, deep breaths, attempting box breathing to still myself. I have a feeling I’ll need it.
When I step into my room, there is a flurry of action. Rosa seems to be directing three women who are packing up box after box of my clothes. One of them is sifting through my jewelry and placing them in separate velvet boxes.
‘I could’ve done this myself, you know.’ I move across the room to her, ignoring the jab of fear that seems to be crushing my rib cage. I fear I will have no control over my life.
Perhaps this will be the last moment in which I will ever have a choice, and this in itself isn’t even one.
‘You don’t have to. Xander sent the women.’
The mention of his name has me clenching my fist at my sides. Rosa sends a look to my tight fingers, and I open them, splaying them against my side.
‘So he knows I’m coming? Was this his idea?’ I would understand it better if it had been. Just one more piece in his empire to move as he saw fit.
Except I wasn’t even his wife yet.
And you’ve already fucked him once.
A pulse throbs all over my body at the thought. I ignore it.
Rosa shakes her head. ‘Both your parents decided. He’s been driven home to await your arrival. Is there anything you’d like to take with you? This might be one of the last times you’ll be here.’
I grit my teeth and flash her a look of anger, my eyes gleaming like gems.
‘I’m not allowed to visit my father?’
‘Not to stay. This will no longer be your home.’
