IRIS
The next couple of days pass by without much incident, just my Shadows and me enjoying each other’s company, and Andrei checking Roman’s gunshot wound, which apparently is healing nicely.
We don’t hear from Nik, though Andrei does from Dima, who says that things are fine and that we will all talk when they get back later today. Roman and I are nestled on the sofa in the main room, the fire lit and filling the space with warmth when I feel a sharp pain in my stomach, then a trickle of something between my legs.
“What is it, Princess?” Ro asks as I hiss, my heart pounding as something inside me tells me there is something wrong.
“I–I don’t know,” I whisper, my hand on my stomach as I straighten up. “Something doesn’t feel right, Ro.”
My wide eyes find his, his face pale as he looks at my hand just as another cramp hits.
“Andrei!” he all but screams over his shoulder. Several pounding footsteps follow his yell while I sit there, needing to look in my knickers but terrified of what I’ll find if I do.
“What is it?” Andrei asks, out of breath from rushing down the stairs just as Hunt, Rowan, and Bubby come in from the back, their eyes wild.
“The baby,” I rush out, and Andrei comes to me, kneeling in front of me, his movements calm and reassuring.
“What about the baby?” he questions, grabbing the bag I didn’t realise he had and pulling out the portable monitor he used the other day just to check in with my baby’s heartbeat.
“Something doesn’t feel right, and I think…” I can’t finish, fucking terrified about saying the words as another sharp pain flashes across my stomach, leaving me sweating and gritting my teeth, trying to keep my terror in check.
“Lie back please, Iris, so I can check the baby’s heartbeat. You think what, Iris?” he prompts, encouraging me to lie back, my head in Roman’s lap.
“I think I might be bleeding,” I murmur, my gaze fixed on his face, unable to look at the guys even as I hear their sharp breaths. Roman takes my trembling hand in his, bringing it up to his lips as Hunt kneels by my head, Rowan settling on the arm of the sofa and Bubby behind us.
“I will check baby’s heartbeat now and then we can take a look, okay?” Andrei asks, his tone calm, which helps to soothe me a little. “But I’d like you to take some deep breaths for me, Iris. Let’s try and keep you as calm as possible. This kind of thing can happen and the baby is perfectly fine.”
Hunt takes my other hand as Andrei squeezes some gel onto my stomach, placing it on his chest. “Breathe with me, baby. In and out.”
I try to follow Hunt, though my breaths are significantly more shaky than his. The sound of the heartbeat fills the room, and I pause, listening. I feel like it’s quicker than it was when we checked two days ago.
“The heartbeat is a little quicker than I’d like,” Andrei says. “But let’s just monitor it for a bit. Would you be okay with Rowan checking for the blood you’re worried about?”
I nod, unable to speak past the terror that is lodged in my throat. I may not have asked for the way my child was conceived, but I have wanted this baby from the moment I discovered its existence, and the idea that I might be losing it…tears spring to my eyes.
“Hey, Princess. I’m sure everything is okay,” Roman says softly, squeezing my hand and placing another kiss on my knuckles. “Keep breathing with Hunt, okay?”
My gaze is fixed on Rowan as he comes into view by my legs, Andrei holding the monitor against my stomach.
“Lift up for me, Lamb,” Rowan orders gently, and I comply, allowing him to pull my leggings and knickers down a little way. To give him credit, his face doesn’t change, neither does Andrei’s.
“There’s blood, maybe a couple of tablespoons worth,” Rowan notes, and Andrei takes a quick look before giving a nod.
“I think, just to be safe, we should head to the nearest hospital, just to get them to check everything. Their equipment is superior to mine, okay, Iris?” He turns to look at me as Rowan pulls my clothes back up and I nod again, my lip trembling. “You guys get her ready, grab the bag with her things, and I’ll meet you out front.”
He removes the monitor and wipes my stomach as he speaks, packing it into his bag, then standing up and grabbing his coat before heading out the front door.
“Come on, Peaches. Let’s get you checked out,” Hunter says as he helps me up. Rowan already has my comfy trainers that I brought with me.
“I’ll run and grab the bag,” Bubby says, heading out of the room. The bag has some of my things, enough for overnight. We packed it not long after we got here, just in case we had to leave in a hurry for any reason.
My entire body is shaking, the worry unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. Roman stands up, his arm is no longer in a sling, though he still has to be careful, and he looks at me with creased brows. “I’m coming.”
He rushes to put his boots on, without socks, grabs mine and his coats, and then comes to my side, handing Hunt my coat as Rowan finishes helping me into my shoes and Bubby comes back down the stairs with my bag in his hand.
We’re ready in a matter of minutes, heading out into the chilly Russian autumn, the car already purring in the driveway. Rowan goes ahead, opening the back passenger door as Hunt and Roman help me get in, Hunt pulling me into his lap so Bubby can fit too, and because I think he wants me as close as I can be. I have no arguments because I need his steady strength. Rowan climbs in the front next to Andrei, and then we’re driving off.
“The hospital is only thirty minutes away, just keep breathing, Iris,” Andrei tells me, my gaze catching his in the rearview mirror.
The journey is silent, aside from Hunt coaching me through breathing slowly and Roman whispering assurances in my ear as he holds my hand. My mind tries to spiral, tries to descend into the panic which is looming, ready to take over, but I don’t allow it, knowing that if I’m calm, it helps my baby.
Soon, we’re pulling up outside the hospital and I’m being ushered into the emergency room, Andrei going up to the desk to explain the situation as he’s the only one that speaks Russian. Despite there being people waiting, I’m taken back to a curtained-off cubicle pretty much straight away.
They don’t allow all the guys, Andrei explaining that there isn’t enough room while I see the doctor, so only Hunt and Andrei come with me, Bubby and the twins offering to stay behind. It hurts my heart to not be with them too, my breaths picking up at leaving them behind until Hunt reminds me to breathe slowly again.
I’m put in a bed, a monitor strapped to me that monitors the baby’s heartbeat and other things according to Andrei. The nurse takes all my vitals while the doctor speaks to Andrei in Russian. Apparently we’re far enough away from any major cities that they don’t speak English here. They do a quick scan, and being able to see for myself that my baby is still there, even if I can still feel it moving around a little, loosens some of the tension from my muscles.
Andrei translates for the doctor, who says that my baby’s heartbeat is a little raised, but as the cramping and bleeding seems to have stopped, they will monitor me for a bit but they’re not too worried at this point. They’ll send me up to the ward, to my own room, so I can have some peace and quiet and rest while I’m being monitored.
Relief leaves me weak, slumping in the bed as Hunt leans over to place a kiss on my forehead.
“You’re doing so well, Peaches. Looking after our baby so good,” he whispers, and I burst into tears at his praise, all the worry and terror overwhelming me. He holds me as the doctor and nurse quietly leave, Andrei leaving too, saying he’ll let the twins and Bubby know what is happening and bring them to the ward once I’ve been moved.
Hunt holds me the entire time we’re waiting, telling me how proud of me he is, how I’m already the best mother, and our child is so lucky to have me. My tears eventually subside, and soon the porters are here to wheel me up to the ward, the monitor in tow. Hunt keeps hold of my hand, helping me to get settled on the bed just as the twins, Bubby, and Andrei come into my private room.
“Fuck, Lamb,” Rowan rasps, heading straight for me, and in a gesture more gentle than I’ve ever known him, he carefully wraps me in his arms. “I’m so glad you’re okay. That our baby is okay.”
“Me too,” I whisper, my eyes burning again as he places a reverent kiss on the top of my head. Roman is on my other side, his hands cupping my cheeks as he presses our foreheads together.
“Love you, so fucking much,” he murmurs, and my chest heats with the emotion that I feel for him, for all of them.
“Love you too, Ro,” I reply, closing my eyes and just breathing him, all of them in for a moment.
“Fuck, babies are stressful,” Bubby says on a long exhale as he waits at the foot of my bed, and it eases some of the lingering tension as we all chuckle. He’s not wrong though, and this little one isn’t even here yet.
Andrei walks towards us, stopping next to Rowan, and Ro lets go of my face so I can give him my attention.
“Thank you, Andrei,” I say, my voice scratchy with everything that I’ve felt in the past hour or so, but gratitude is up there, for this man who is a friend of Nik’s yet took such good care of me. The skin around his eyes crinkles as he gives me a smile.
“Of course, Iris. I got them to print out the scan for you,” Andrei says, reaching over and handing me the square piece of paper. “Also, I wasn’t sure, but do you want to know the sex of the baby?”
I pause, looking up from the grainy image of my child as I think about his question. I don’t really care, it doesn’t matter to me as long as it’s a healthy baby, but I am curious now, whereas before I wanted a surprise.
“Yes, I’d like to know.” I nibble my lip, waiting for him to tell me.
“You’re having a boy, Iris. Congratulations,” Andrei informs me, his smile wide.
“A boy,” I repeat, turning to look at Rowan, then Roman, and finally settling on Hunt who is at the foot of the bed. His arm is slug over Bubby’s shoulders, holding him close, and I can see the reassurance it gives the teenager. “We’re having a baby boy, Daddy.”
“Yes we are, baby,” he replies, a wide grin splitting his face. “And he’ll be loved so fucking hard.”
Before anyone can say anything else, the door flies open, my heart jumping as a dark-clad figure storms into the room.
“Dorogaia,” Nik’s voice rasps as his stormy eyes connect with mine. The skin of his face is tight, his jaw fixed as he rushes to the bed, practically pushing Andrei and Rowan out of the way. “What happened? Are you okay?”
The whites of his eyes are showing as he takes my face in his hands, studying me for any sign of injury.
“I’m okay, just a little scared. Our boy likes to keep us on our toes,” I tell him, my hand reaching out to stroke his face.
“Boy, Dorogaia?” He blinks, his eyes less panicked, his body still.
“Yes, we’re having a boy. Look.” I lift the scan, and his hands remain on my face even as his eyes dart to the picture of our baby.
“I get a brother and son, all in one day,” he whispers, his lips lifting into a smile, and my chest fills with warmth again, at the sheer wonder on his face. “You are such a clever girl, Moye Solntse.”
I know that this is a little…unconventional. The fact that I’m in love with the son of my baby’s biological father, plus three others. But this is our family, our chosen family, and biology has nothing to do with it.
“We will teach him how to love, how beautiful he is, how wanted he has always been,” Nik declares, leaning in and placing a kiss on my forehead. “He will never feel the cold, never know what pain is, never doubt his parents adore him.”
Tears sting my eyes, knowing that what Nik is saying is something that not only he has felt and experienced, but all of us have at some point. All of our parents have let us down, have wounded us in ways that no child should ever be hurt.
But we will break that chain. We will not let it continue with our child. The pain stops here.
“He’ll be loved for who he is, and he will never be left alone and afraid,” Roman adds on my other side, Hunt coming up next to him.
“He won’t be afraid to show his feelings, because we will always be there to catch him, to hold his hand, and show him that he is okay,” Hunt says softly, one hand taking hold of Roman’s, the other coming to rest on my leg and squeezing.
“He won’t have to defend himself, because we will be there to protect him, and I will personally rip apart anyone who ever dares to even think about hurting my boy,” Rowan vows in only the way Rowan can, as he stands beside Nik, his hand on my other leg.
“He’ll never know what it’s like to be hungry, or feel the fist of his father in anger,” Bubby says, his voice soft, a world of pain in his eyes that shouldn’t be there. Rowan pulls him against his side, laying a light kiss on the boy’s temple, and Bubby’s eyes widen, but he rests his head on Rowan’s shoulder, accepting the comfort that my dark Shadow is offering.
We listen to the heartbeat of our child, our baby boy, all connected and with the promises that we made, and I know that this is what I want for the rest of my life. My men beside me, our family growing and so full of love it shines like stardust.
And woe betide anyone who tries to threaten that.
